are you so shy because you have an std?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Randomize
