So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
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So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
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i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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