Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?

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(310): View more from California

its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off

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(325): View more from Texas

I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder

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(304): View more from West Virginia

please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(217): View more from Illinois

chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense

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(234): View more from Ohio

omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic

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(231): View more from Michigan

OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?

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(937): View more from Ohio

That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.

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(+61): View more from Australia

I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that

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