How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow