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• (425): View more from Washington

  Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  When are you freeeeeeeeee?

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know

  (1-989): View more from Michigan

  no

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (916): View more from California

  How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.

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• (228): View more from Mississippi

  She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old

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• (813): View more from Florida

  You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.

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• (760): View more from California

  I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...

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