sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
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