i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
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