I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
