she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
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You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
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Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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