Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Your mouth is God's brothel.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
