he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
