I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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