Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
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while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
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Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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