I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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