whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
