anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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