who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
