It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Randomize
