we have pet lesbian snakes
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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