i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Randomize
