Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
