My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
