he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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