I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Fuck appropriateness.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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