you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Randomize
