walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
