so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I'm getting married
To pizza
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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