loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
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