nut hugger
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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