Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
