if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
