Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Ladies don't puke and tell
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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