she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
COCAINE IS GR8
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
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