What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize