Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize