You were right. It hurts to walk today.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
