I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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