youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize