And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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