You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
as a side note pls kill me
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
