Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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