Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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