Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
