I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
