She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize