this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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