Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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