Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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