i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
