I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
