you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
i would one night stand the shit outta him
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
