i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
