its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
